Charlie’s fingers aren’t what they used to be

As far as the culinary history of the Gold Coast goes the pineapple, bacon and cheese (you might add banana to the mix) fingers at Charlie’s should be icons.
When Charlie’s opened on Cavill Avenue in 1976 I’m told it didn’t look as smart as it does now but the fingers were a favourite.
And just as the cafe – restaurant is too strong a word – has been made over so have the fingers but for the worse.
When I first holidayed in Australia in 1988 it was to Charlie’s that Jak took me after a good shag at the Sheraton in Brisvegas.
It was then that my glamourous dreams of what is called Surfers Paradise were shattered. I was introduced to what I now know is a perpetual building site.
I travelled to Queensland to chase the woman I loved because I was entranced with stories of the bananas and passion fruit her parents grew in their back garden. It didn’t take long after arriving to realise that everybody grew bananas and passion fruit in their backgardens but I was sold on the Charlie’s fingers, a snack inspired by the Hawaiian pizza that speaks volumes about the food preferences of tropical Queensland.
Our eastern european waitress deserves full marks for thoughtfully bending over in front of me to give a grandstand view of her more than ample cleavage. “Savignon Blank” (Sauvignon Blanc) she confirmed, the staple of wine lists on the coast, Jak ordering Australia’s best selling wine Oyster Bay which is made by new Zealanders. We also ordered a full $14.50 serve ($17 odd with 15% holiday mark-up) of “Charlie’s famous fingers”.
Two saucers soon arrived for us to eat our fingers from plus the bill, held in place from the breeze by a single paper tube of sugar.

The Oyster Bay Sauvignon Blanc was everything we expected of it. Acid yet sweet and tropical fruity, almost the embodiment of the Natural Confectionery Company sour treats in liquid form. This isn’t a good thing in wine which also had the volatile aroma of nail polish remover. I can’t think of a food I’d match it with although it may go well with a TV show such as A Current Affair.
The fingers were not what we remembered or expected. I realised how cynical the tourist restaurants in Surfers had become. Two pieces of toast covered with diced ham, pineapple and cheese grilled. Nothing more or less. It was the sort of thing that if I had served at home that Jak would have sent back as a slap dash effort.
The owners of Charlie’s are taking the piss and ripping off tourists.
We should have gone around the corner at the Absynthe Bakery where for about $5 I could have a ham and cheese croissant prepared under the auspices of Michelin starred chef Meyjitte Boughenout who has lifted the game on the coast.

Tagged as: Absynthe bakery, Charlie's, Gold Coast, Surfers Paradise